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A new Category

21 February 2008

I spend quite a lot of time on here editing and writing articles. When I’m not here I’m being Jim’s PA; a tongue in cheek job title, which Jim once used when I’d made a venue booking for the Company’s Christmas do! In reality I am a buyer ie I search for the best deal for company purchases, secretary ie I answer the phone and take messages and I keep our websites up to date ie I do what I originally said I did; sit here typing! In my spare time I do the cooking, cleaning etc and all that’s required to keep this house ticking over.

I do have a lot of quiet time and it’s during this time that I get to muse over things; things to do or things in the news or just generally random thoughts. Hoovering this morning I had the idea to add my ramblings to Our Little Shop, so here it is…

During this mornings hoovering I was thinking how lucky I am. My days are busy, but that’s down to me. I have a lot of time where it is me time and within reason i can do as I please. Although Jim and I both work from home we both have separate offices and generally don’t see each other throughout the day apart from coffee breaks and lunchtime. Most of our communicating in the day is either via email or via our internal telephone line. It works for us.

Not only do I realise that I’m lucky to be able to do something I enjoy, because after nearly 20 years of nursing; a job i really didn’t enjoy, I know how awful it is to have to turn up for a job that really doesn’t suit, I’m also lucky to have met Jim. Now I don’t do sloppy or nauseating and that statement is both, but it is true. We finally got around to getting married last week. No one was invited and it was just the two of us and two little boys. We have both done the white wedding thing before and it didn’t work out. This was just for us. Wedding attire, perfection, sudden diets to look ‘thin’, and putting on show were not for us. We know too well that none of that matters when you find it’s all gone wrong. What mattered to us was that we wanted to be married to each other and after more than 7 years together we were hardly rushing in to it or in the flush of first love!

We did have a family party, which was for Jim’s 50th, but we also knew it was to celebrate our wedding, just none of our guests knew! I was asked by one of my sisters in law why we decided to marry and it was something I had questioned before hand. Would it really make any difference? If it wasn’t going to be a ‘Big’ wedding then why bother? The reality is that somehow it didn’t feel right not to be married. The only stumbling block had always been that we didn’t want a fuss and so we had always planned to on or around Jim’s 50th. Executing the plan took some thinking about. We were aware that people might be offended and we didn’t want to do that. I don’t think we offended anyone, I certainly hope we didn’t and everyone seems genuinely pleased.

So today, I thought how lovely it is to be married. It does feel different. Jim is my husband, not my ‘partner’ or ‘other half’ or any other description I may have used in the past. I find myself surprisingly advocating marriage. I never thought I would. Have the wedding that suits you; have poetry, flowers, dresses etc, but most importantly do what’s right for you and for the right reasons. As I’ve already said who attended, how stunning you look (or not!), how much you spend (or don’t) the venue, none of this will matter when the day is over. What will matter is that you marry the right person.

Written by Jane · Filed Under Blog 

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